Don’t mind the tall, dark stranger

  Megamind (2010) As their home planet died, Megamind (Will Ferrell) and Metro Man (Brad Pitt) were sent to Earth, where the two outsiders embarked on opposite paths. Metro Man became a beloved super hero, while Megamind chose a life of villainy. After discovering Metro Man’s weakness, Megamind sets a trap and destroys his nemesis, but… Continue reading Don’t mind the tall, dark stranger

500 mummies

  The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (2008) As he nears death, Qin Shi Huang (Jet Li), the first emperor of China, sends his lackey, General Ming, to find a mysterious sorceress, Zi Yuan, who’s allegedly discovered the secret of immortality. After he discovers a budding romance between Ming and Yuan, a jealous Huang executes Ming, and,… Continue reading 500 mummies

I silently killed the last guardians of the last seductive galaxy

  Kill Your Darlings (2013) Naive freshman Allen Ginsberg (Daniel Radcliffe) enrolls at Columbia University where he meets Lucien Carr (Dane DeHaan), Jack Kerouac (Jack Huston), William S. Burroughs (Ben Foster) and Edie Parker (Elizabeth Olsen). Carr bribes an older man, David Kammerer (Michael C. Hall) to write his papers by promising sexual favors, but when he grows bored with… Continue reading I silently killed the last guardians of the last seductive galaxy

Kinsey spied on the sexy lives of gremlins

  Kinsey (2004) After unassuming biology professor Alfred Kinsey (Liam Neeson) falls in love and marries his student, Clara McCmillen (Laura Linney), he discovers an insatiable appetite for sex. When the surprising results of a classroom survey in his sex education class demonstrate how little research has been done in the field, Kinsey dedicates his life to the… Continue reading Kinsey spied on the sexy lives of gremlins

The shadow man fell to Earth

  Val Lewton: The Man in the Shadows (2007) Tasked with producing profitable low-budget films for RKO studios in the early 1940s, Val Lewton delivered such well-regarded films as Cat People (1942), I Walked with a Zombie (1943), The Seventh Victim (1943), and The Curse of the Cat People (1944). Relying on innuendo and intimation, his… Continue reading The shadow man fell to Earth

Starsky & Hercules

  Hercules (1997) Jealous Hades (James Woods) plots to overthrow his brother Zeus (Rip Torn) and rule Mount Olympus by killing Hercules (Tate Donovan), Zeus’s infant son. He sends his minions, Pain and Panic, to give the child a formula designed to make him mortal, but they fail to give him all of it. Deprived of immortality, but maintaining… Continue reading Starsky & Hercules

Surprise!: This story never ends

  Pullet Surprise (1997) Foghorn Leghorn is one of my favorite Looney Tunes because my dad loved the character, but this lesser entry featuring the character is only somewhat amusing.     The NeverEnding Story (1984) Bastian Balthazar Bux reads a book to distract him from the troubles of his adolescence. The book tells the story of Fantasia and its fight… Continue reading Surprise!: This story never ends

My prince of Dogtown

  The Prince and the Pauper (1990) Longing for freedom from his royal responsibilities, a prince switches places with a peasant doppelgänger. Mark Twain’s novel satirizes the rigid English class system during the Elizabethan period. As expected, this Disney short significantly dilutes the satirical elements and, to increase dramatic tension, adds Pete as an evil palace guard using the… Continue reading My prince of Dogtown

Porgy, Dillinger, and the unbearable Bess

  The Unbearable Lightnesss of Being (1988) When waitress Tereza (Juliette Bincohe) moves in with her lover, brain surgeon Tomas (Daniel Day-Lewis), she’s confused by his Bohemian lifestyle. When Sabina, one of Tomas’s other lovers, gets Tereza a job as a photographer, she inadvertently photographs Soviet tanks invading Czechoslovakia, and, realizing their importance, smuggles them to… Continue reading Porgy, Dillinger, and the unbearable Bess

Heaven knows you’ve been unfaithful, Mr. X

  Malcolm X (1992) Minor criminal Malcolm Little (Denzel Washington) is arrested for robbing the home of a wealthy white couple and sentenced to eight to ten years in prison because of his association with white women.  In prison, he joins the Nation of Islam led by Elijah Muhammad and changes his name to Malcolm X. After he… Continue reading Heaven knows you’ve been unfaithful, Mr. X